I think the last week was the beginning of the cynical swings in my life. I somehow don’t like to be cynical at all but some things happen and then you just can’t stop being cynical at all. Even if your people mean the best for you, you’d doubt them without a cause, or point out a possible cause which is most likely not true. I watched Forrest Gump yesterday and one of the most outstanding things I found in his life is that he has very limited words and expressions. If you think about it, the amount of guesswork we can all make about others is incredibly high. Some people were here from abroad recently, and I was thinking, why are they doing such a small talk! I went to get a hair spa and I was wondering whether they are using genuine products or not, so I asked them to get a sealed pack to check the authenticity. When people try to be sweet, I wonder whether they are actually sweet. These questions are not plain obvious, of course if that someone is trying to say sweet things, he could be having an ulterior motive, or the spa guy could be using fake products.
I wanted to find a remedy, so I called one of my close friends and told him to give me any thought to counter with cynicism when I came across. He laughed at me, so I again said, please anything that I should do when I am at my cynical worst. He waited and told me that I have an issue in thinking that all people are good, and that all people, if not good, can be dealt with good words and good deeds. He said that I need to exclude those people from the list of those people who matter to me, and then deal with right.
He was very correct in analyzing me that I often tend to assume the best in people, and want to overlook their bad points. But I still couldn’t buy being neutral. But in my attempt to deal with this, I got a half answer, worth trying maybe.
“STOP” “PAUSE”, are the words I’d like to recommend because they did work for me. Stop thinking and Pause. Try to stay in that state for as long as possible. Think that your mind should not react. If you smoke, try and smoke out the bad thoughts, and if you don’t smoke or don’t understand this term, exhale from your mouth!
Do this as often as you want, till the time you feel you are better.
But the most important thought you need to be lesser and lesser cynical everyday is that no matter how bad today looks like, you need to trust life and trust people because they are just like who you are. And then understand yourself so that you can understand them better. The problem that I have with my cynicism is not that it’s a bad habit or that I am becoming negative, but the fact that I know I am on the verge of becoming a deal maker myself. More often than not, we see ourselves in other people. And I know the consequences of doubting life. It happens when you are not able to focus on what is truly important in your life, when you do not have a clear objective, and your mind has no prowess to do anything that is meaningful to itself. It happens because we have seen other people being deceitful, but when our state of mind is good enough, we will attribute their mindset to them. On the other hand when our minds are in a mess, we think the entire world is a copy of those who cheated us. Eventually, we lose the good people in our life as well as those who are kind, and people are the center of our lives. Money, clothes, houses, food, none of these things can give you the happiness that people can.